'Negative feelings' in the INSIDE out

Gerber 2985

Member
Sep 9, 2020
76
59
18
Hello all,
I had a question during a session with Shaindy Krausz and she suggested that I share it.

I have started to hear more here about 'Negative feelings' in the inside out.

The reason that I am writing 'negative feelings' with quotes around it as that I heard Basya Friedman discuss this on a free training

where she pointed out that we can't necessarily call those feelings 'negative'. (It was in DLFS)

I have never yet understood that concept though I have accepted that in an open curious way.

Until now I understood the following. I used to be mostly lost in the outside in. But as I learned more, i would have the following experiences.

I would be FEELING low feelings, or angry feelings, or lack of connection or love feelings in a relationship but I would be aware, albeit intellectually (i believe, it feels a little more than that), and I would be able to make decisions based on that information that formally would be hidden from me.

There is definitely less suffering when I am able to look in that direction but I was definately being hit or experiencing those kiinds of painful feelings.

I thought that was a higher 'level'. Yes outside in but there was something much more available to me.

But in DFLS it became clear that there were negative feelings IN the inside out.

And here's the question. I knew that what I was experiencing certainly wasn't in the inside out because the QUALITIES of the inside out were NOT present.

I am not feeling, love, motivation, connection and all those other characteristics.

So I am wondering- what can negative feelings in the inside out look like? By definition I have to be experiencing all the wonderful qualities of the inside out.

Can you explain or give an example of such an experience (and how it is or when would this information be helpful and relevant?)

Thank you.
 
  • Like
Reactions: willow

willow

New member
Jul 21, 2022
6
3
3
Hello all,
I had a question during a session with Shaindy Krausz and she suggested that I share it.

I have started to hear more here about 'Negative feelings' in the inside out.

The reason that I am writing 'negative feelings' with quotes around it as that I heard Basya Friedman discuss this on a free training

where she pointed out that we can't necessarily call those feelings 'negative'. (It was in DLFS)

I have never yet understood that concept though I have accepted that in an open curious way.

Until now I understood the following. I used to be mostly lost in the outside in. But as I learned more, i would have the following experiences.

I would be FEELING low feelings, or angry feelings, or lack of connection or love feelings in a relationship but I would be aware, albeit intellectually (i believe, it feels a little more than that), and I would be able to make decisions based on that information that formally would be hidden from me.

There is definitely less suffering when I am able to look in that direction but I was definately being hit or experiencing those kiinds of painful feelings.

I thought that was a higher 'level'. Yes outside in but there was something much more available to me.

But in DFLS it became clear that there were negative feelings IN the inside out.

And here's the question. I knew that what I was experiencing certainly wasn't in the inside out because the QUALITIES of the inside out were NOT present.

I am not feeling, love, motivation, connection and all those other characteristics.

So I am wondering- what can negative feelings in the inside out look like? By definition I have to be experiencing all the wonderful qualities of the inside out.

Can you explain or give an example of such an experience (and how it is or when would this information be helpful and relevant?)

Thank you.
new here what is DLFS
 

Gerber 2985

Member
Sep 9, 2020
76
59
18
Hi Willow,
Welcome!
I'm sorry for not explaining.
It's the Double feeling ladder system. Which is a free training in 2 parts which Brett did.
I hope someone else can give the link. I can't find it this minute. I found it extremely well worth it.
 
  • Like
Reactions: willow

Brett Chitty

PTI Lead Trainer
Staff member
PTI Platinum Member
Aug 12, 2020
329
200
43
46
March, United Kingdom
But in DFLS it became clear that there were negative feelings IN the inside out.

And here's the question. I knew that what I was experiencing certainly wasn't in the inside out because the QUALITIES of the inside out were NOT present.

I am not feeling, love, motivation, connection and all those other characteristics.

So I am wondering- what can negative feelings in the inside out look like? By definition I have to be experiencing all the wonderful qualities of the inside out.
When you are looking at feelings, there are two directions you can take.
The first one is "The quality of the feeling."
The second one is "Does the feeling have the power?"
Very different!

The problem with looking at a quality of a feeling is that you are now subject to the entire spectrum of feelings, hence "The Ladder." But looking at the ladder itself on its own isn't what is going to help make a distinction BETWEEN paradigms (or dimensions, or worlds, or universe etc, I just prefer paradigms).
I'd go as far as saying, it's going to keep you in the same paradigm that got you looking at the quality of the feeling.
Don't forget, any feeling is NOT a principle. Any feeling is not a power. No matter how beautiful the feeling is, and no matter how difficult the feeling is as well. I'm not saying "not to feel anything," so don't turn it into a prescription please, just in case - I'm just explaining the underlying foundation to understand what feelings do and don't do rather than what to feel or what not to feel.
It's not WHAT you feel, it's THAT you feel.

The second direction is very different.
Instead of looking at the quality of the feeling, we look at whether the feeling is a principle or not. There are only two possible choices here. Either the feeling is a principle or the feeling isn't a principle. Either the feeling is a power, or the feeling isn't a power.

But the Principle of Thought is super helpful in understanding feeling.
The Principle of Thought itself is a power. That's where power truly lies. So if that's where the power truly lies, because it's a principle - something that never changes (constant), is pre-existing, is neutral, and universal - it must rule out the possibility of ANYTHING that isn't a principle being a power. Including feelings.
Feelings change many times a day so it's not a constant, it's not pre-existing because a feeling is after the fact, it's certainly isn't neutral because there are all kinds of feelings to feel, and it's not universal - you're having a feeling but that feeling is obviously not felt by everyone at the same moment!
So there's isn't any possibility of a feeling being a principle.

So what does a negative feeling look like in the inside-out? Exactly the same as a positive feeling in the inside-out!
Sure, the quality of the feeling WILL be different, but both of these feelings have NO power because we are in the inside-out paradigm. No power to take over your mind. No power to capture your mind. No power to add thinking to your mind. No power to be your boss.

Unlike the outside-in, where the quality of feeling IS going to matter because the outside-in paradigm will stop you from recognising the Principle of Thought at play here. So it makes you go all in into the "quality of the feelings" and lead to more thinking about "what do I want to feel" and "what feelings do I want to AVOID feeling?" Judgmentalism has already kicked in there.
Because of this Judgmentalism, no wonder we engage in prescription stuff, doing stuff, techniques stuff, find something out there to make us feel a certain way etc.
The Outside-In paradigm is a paradigm of prescriptions, of techniques, of coping strategies, of willpower etc.

Do you think it makes sense to use any prescription on a feeling that has no power?
If you said, "no it doesn't," I didn't think so either.

It's the paradigm that matters, not the quality of the feeling.
And the only thing that can get you to go from one paradigm to a true paradigm is INSIGHT.
That's why I'd rather not talk too much about the quality of feeling, just recognising that there is one - that is enough.

There was one occasion when I had a positive feeling at an event. I was having a WONDERFUL time! It was an expenses-paid trip, so I was taking advantage of this facility. I spent quite a bit.
Then insight happened. Immediately, I felt EMBARRASSED by what I had done. The insight taught me that I had been greedy, I was totally unreasonable to the person who was going to pay for my expenses, and that I was just taking advantage of that person instead of being fair and reasonable.
So I went to the guy and expressed my sincere apologies and said to him, I won't do that again, it's not respectful at all to you, and I have to take some responsibility.

So, there you go! A negative feeling from the inside-out, but the knowledge that arose from within that feeling, because it's Thought (and not the feeling), was something I didn't know I needed to learn. And thank God it did and I learned the lesson, and as a result, I evolved some.

Allow me to ask you a question:
If you could choose, would you rather have a positive feeling that has the power over you, or a negative feeling that has NO power over you?
(which is the same as saying, would you rather have a positive feeling from the Outside-In, or a negative feeling from the Inside-Out?)

Answers below, please! 😆
 
Last edited:

willow

New member
Jul 21, 2022
6
3
3